“Wherever you are, be all there. It is only possible in the posture of eucharisteo (thanksgiving). Give thanks and see God. Full attention slows the current. Simplicity is a matter of focus. That keeps the focus simple.” – Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts
So much wisdom in such a short paragraph. I have really been struggling with this lately. I sometimes wonder why I feel so distant from the life I have lived so far, from childhood until very recently. It seems to me that this paragraph is the answer. I feel distant from my life because I feel like I haven't really been living. Because I haven't been "all there."
Very rarely have I been focused and truly living in the now. As a child I think I tended to simply react to things without really considering and thinking about my reaction first. I don't remember things feeling very important to me - it was like I was just drifting along, doing what I was taught and trying to get the things I wanted. It's a very shallow way to live.
Today, I think a lot more, and reflect quite a bit, but when it comes to living in the now, with full focus on the present, again I am failing. Life is improv, and I suck at improv. :) I freeze up. My mind scrambles for the best "appropriate reaction" to the words or actions of someone, but sometimes the easy answer isn't the real one. It's polite to laugh when someone tells a joke, but if that joke mocks the God I serve, or if it is vulgar or crude, and I laugh without thinking because I know the person WANTS me to laugh...
And here is the simple answer to all of that. Wherever you are, be there. Think before you react. React in a real way. Live the best you can in the present, loving God with all your heart and honoring him with all your actions, and you will have nothing to regret.
But how hard it is to focus! That's the struggle.
“When I stop speeding through life, I find the joy in each days doings, in the life that cannot be bought, but only discovered, created, savored, and lived.” – Katrina Kennison